“Female job applicants with children are 44 percent less likely to be hired for a job than are childless women with similar qualifications. Fathers, by contrast, are 19 percent MORE likely to be hired than are comparably qualified men without children.”—
"Getting a Job: Is there a Motherhood Penalty?" American Journal of Sociology, 2007 (via checkprivilege)
“The thing about this appropriation of the burqa that people need to understand is that people like Lady Gaga haven’t done a thing for the communities [here and abroad] that wear, live and breathe the garb who are subjected to harassment for doing so. The words “appreciation” and “admiration” are painfully hollow when you take a piece of clothing from a community and strip it of its intent and the consequences that come from it. Lady Gaga makes millions and taxes subsequently take a huge chunk of those millions. Therein, a quarter of her taxes are used to ravage Muslim majority populations. Has she spoken out about this? Has anyone orientalist who bastardizes our garb done so? Where were they when the Sikh tragedy happened? Where are they now when Newsweek posts a horribly offensive article on Muslim rage, aggressively written by their puppet Ayaan Hirsi Ali, who I’m ashamed to call my fellow Somali? Do they come to our defense when we’re expected to kneel over and apologize on behalf of extremists, who funnily enough kill us as well? If I wear a burqa, niqab.. or hell even a fucking hijab, I’m a stupid, brown savage who has no capacity to think for herself. But when Gaga wears it, its revolutionary and fashionable. People love to scream equality and colorblindedness when such an event arises, but such a world is completely theoretical until we fix these the caricatured perceptions about Islam. The power dynamics here cannot be ignored.”
— My friend Khadijah and her thoughts on Lady Gaga recently being spotted donning a “burqa” (via maarnayeri)
If I hear "you're the first Asian girl I've ever kissed, dated, or whatever" one more time, I might scream. Why is it necessary to bring up my race? You appeared bearable until that comment. I am not a fetish or something to check off your bucket list. I am not a novelty. I am not "exotic" and please stop commenting on how you want to dress me up like a Japanese schoolgirl. It's off putting and offensive.
So tired of people fetishizing Asians. So tired of my "friends" blurting out "ASIAN" when they see me in the hallways or trying to poke my eyelids or touch my hair. So tired of my "friends" telling me that I act too "white" and it's disappointing. So tired of them invalidating my arguments by saying that I'm overreacting, that it's not racism if it's positive, that people love me because I'm asian and I should be happy. So tired of them arguing over me like I'm their property.
“By comparison, domestic violence is downright controversial. It touches on complicated issues like power, rape culture, victim-blaming, and gender roles, and stirs up uncomfortable emotions. While few people would claim they support abusers, many known perpetrators of domestic violence — from Roman Polanski to Chris Brown to a number of football players — remain venerated cultural figures. Is it any wonder that, even though domestic violence affects many more women and families, breast cancer is the issue we’ve all come to associate with October? Every year 232,340 women are diagnosed with invasive breast cancer; 1.3 million are assaulted by their husbands or boyfriends. One in eight women will suffer from breast cancer in her lifetime. One in four will experience domestic violence. Good luck finding that statistic on a yogurt lid this month.”—
No one wants to make as big a deal out of domestic violence because then they’d be forced to hold men accountable for their role in this issue, which ranges from full-on raging violence to passivity as their friends and brothers contribute to this epidemic. Nope, fighting an invisible monster is much less scary than a real one that can look you in the eye.
“When I was four years old, a doctor advised my parents that I should undergo a “routine” hysterectomy. It was recommended, the doctor said, to prevent the future inconvenience of menstruation. My parents, thankfully, were horrified and high-tailed it out of there, taking me and my four year old uterus with them.”—
- So why don’t the rest of you just lighten the fuck up.
In fact, I’m Asian and I think it’s funny.
It’s just a joke.
You say it because there is a place inside of you that hurts and it shouldn’t.
You think it’s weak. You think, who the fuck cares?
Maybe you say it because you’ve heard it so many times that you’ve become desensitized to hurt, and you accept it as normal.
Or maybe you say it because you’ve made yourself blind to injustices so you never hurt at all.
I laughed. I laughed at the jokes and the stereotypes. I laughed because I made myself laugh, and the sound of it covered up my discomfort, and my shame.
When you laugh enough, laughing becomes second nature.
Not caring becomes second nature. And then, you eye everyone who does care with disdain. They have no sense of humor. They’re too sensitive. You’re better than them. They make the rest of us look bad.
They’re being a bad minority.
They’re so annoying. They’re the reason why people hate feminists.
What I actually meant when I said “I don’t mind” is:
Please accept me
Please think I’m special
Please make me one of you
And what they heard when I said “I don’t mind” is that it’s okay.
It’s okay to laugh at someone for being Asian - my mother, father, my grandparents; my cousins, my aunts, my uncles.
It’s okay to laugh at women - my mother, my sisters, my friends
It’s okay to laugh at queers - my friends, my lovers
Because they’re friends with a PoC, you see, so they can’t actually be racist, especially if their friend is okay with it.
I said it was okay. So it must be.
Everyone else is just oversensitive. Everyone else is just uptight.
What they heard when I said “I don’t mind” is that if you mind, you don’t matter. Your experiences don’t matter. Because they have this friend who said it was okay.
What I meant when I said “I don’t mind”:
I want to laugh with you; I don’t want to be laughed at.
And what I didn’t know was that just because I didn’t mind, it didn’t make me special. When you laughed at those people, that included me, too.
And what they don’t tell you when you say “I don’t mind,” is that from that moment on, you will be championed as a representative of an entire race/gender/orientation/identity. And your words of “I don’t mind,” or “I think it’s funny” will be used as an example, to put down countless others of other races/genders/orientations.
To say “I don’t mind” is not what makes you strong. It takes far more strength to care, and address the issues. It takes courage to look unpopular, to look “humorless” or to be a “bad minority.”
We should mind. It does matter. If more people minded, instead of feeling like they didn’t have to, then maybe people would start seeing that there is a very real problem.
People out here being murdered for being brown and your ass crying cause you can’t wear something that has cultural significance to them. BITCH BYE. I’m sure the last thing Desis wanna see when they browse the bindi tag is your cross eyed ass looking foolish making duck lips and being ~spiritual~. Fuck outta here.
“The term Hispanic, coined by technomarketing experts and by the designers of political campaigns, homogenizes our cultural diversity (Chicanos, Cubans, and Puerto Ricans become indistinguishable), avoids our indigenous cultural heritage, and links us directly with Spain. Worse yet, it possesses connotations of upward mobility and political obedience.”—
so my plan for halloween is to dress up as a Nazgul with my black horse and go trick or treating but instead of saying “trick or treat” i’ll either scream or hiss “Bagginssssssssss, Shhhhhhhire” and then ransack their villages in my search for the One Ring